31 dezembro, 2012

Happy New Year 2013

I wish you  to have the strengh to find yourselves
I wish you to have the courage to change what goes wrong in your lives
I wish you to take care of yourselves
I wish you to make decisions that will make you grow
I wish you to love yourselves
Well...I will try to apply those to myself! 
We know that we must respect ourselves and yet fail to do it. The other day, I was very enthusiastic about starting a new diet on the first of january then i realize it will certainly not happen that way...as it hadn't for the previous years! Where will I take my compensation when I'm frustrated, in anger, exausted, depressed, or simply celebrating? Does anyone have the answer to that? Life is a struggle and most of the time we don't want to do or go...but yet we do it out of duty. We need to pay our bills. We need to go on. Every one has his on path mine last year was a challenging one, work and work was the summary of it. Now it had reach a stage where I feel guilty just to relax! What do I want to prove?

 Never give up on your dreams
enter with the right foot in 2013

27 dezembro, 2012


I just call a friend asking him if by any chance he would rent his little house by the sea where i could go by my own with my dog Fidji to pass new year's eve. All by myself, coming to terms with my demons. 
I have reached an age where i should be more confident and happy with me. I realize that's is not the case i still have inside me deep wounds that cry for healing and that i tend to ignore them  being more in... the others are more important than me! 
My saboteur whispers me that "you are not important, you are worthless,you don't count" I have this anger yet to be resolved so of course i am often confronted with a feeling of injustice. Back in my youths I felt powerless when my parents discussed with one another which...was on day basis! I felt this mixture of anger and sadness and never experienced a calm mind. We tend to reproduce the same patterns that our parents did imagining that we'll do better inconscious young souls!
 The purpose is not doing better which is a dead end but to heal what lies beneath... So that's my goal for the year to come. HEALING.
I wish you to overcome your fears
I wish you to love yourself
I wish you to respect yourself
I wish you to be assertive
I wish you to be creative
I wish to have the courage to take the right decisions
I wish you to be positive
I wish you to BELIEVE