18 janeiro, 2011

One of a kind...

Heading to Paris and tomorrow one of my favorite cities in the world Mumbai ...will definitely enjoy the best chicken masala in town then Paris again staying with friends then.....well you don't really want to know my head is turning already......Will be back in february! See you
Remember to dance laugh enjoy
Have fun

PS: my album page is a text reminding us how each one of us is special and unique

17 janeiro, 2011

Do i give enough?

We all live thinking we are imortals. I mean of course we know we are going to die but it seems so far away in the rush of all the important things we have to accomplish! My beautiful grand mother passed away when i was still a teenager and there isn't a single day that i don't thing of her in a way or the other.
The longing of her smile her hugs her odor "opium" all the secrets we share. I thought she would live forever never see her aging. 
A very close friend had an unexpected and sudden death in her family, the wave of despair comes and paralysed her. No words will comfort her.
I took me a while before going to sleep with the same endless questions  
 Do i give enough? 
Am i a good wife?
Am i good sister?
Am i a good daughter?
Am i a good friend?
Am i ........
Looking back i don't remember most of the discussions i had with my relatives or friends. So why have them in the first place? How can we erase the useless ego?
If i should die tomorrow...Do i have any regrets? Did i make up with past friends? Did i say how much i love my father for all the confidence he gave me? Did i say my mother how much i love her and admire her? Did i say my little big brother how much i am proud of him? Did i say my red hair friend how much she is a fighter and an example to follow? Did i say my astrologuer friend what an extraordinary intuition she have and how brave she is? Did i say my favorite single mother how she is a courageous?
Do i say enough how much I deeply LOVE  my half and how much i admire him? 
But more than saying it...am i living and acting with love? 
Do i listen enough?
Do i pay enough attention?
Do i ?.........
What remain of us when we leave? 
Have a good week...

11 janeiro, 2011

Are you open?

Just finished two extraordinaries books "The Help" Kathryn Stockett and "Shanghai girls" Lisa See.
Both about discrimination and injustice and how women fight back, never giving up their dreams and their ability to give no matter what.
We are transported back in the sixties, Mississipi, how black women cooked, cleaned and raised little white children and have their own private toilets because of the diseases they might carry for example or others discriminations each one worse than the others.
"Shanghai girls" is the beautiful story of two sisters back in the sixties too, who after their father lost his fortune were sold and went living in chinatown Los Angeles and couldn't get out of it no matter what.
I am fortunate to have been raised by a french mother and a portuguese father both open to the world. I remember the parties in our house where my father was at the time responsible for black and arab countries. I remember mom wearing the traditional boubou offered to her by the Senegal's ambassador. I knew from childhood that we are equals in rights. In reading those powerful books i tried to imagine what would have been my reactions in those terrible years. Would i have been brave? Would i have been coward? I realize that the ultimate gift my parents offered me are the openess and the tolerance.
I am at home anywhere in the world in a rich or in a poor house i will adapt and be thankful for it.

There is still i believe much to be done towards tolerance, information or most of the times the lack of it is the main responsible for all the fears towards the "ones that are supposedly different".
Hope you like my new "memories" album...
Have a good week

05 janeiro, 2011

Le grand Bleu

How odd!  I just received an email from my first love back when i was seventeen... It didn't last long but for me it lasted a lifetime. I relish that year as one of total happiness, my grand-mother moved on with us as she wanted "to divorce" after fifty years of marriage as my grand father didn't make the celebrations of half a century they spent together. We didn't take it seriously but loved having Mamie around everyday she cooked us different and delicious meals, sewing in the afternoon, her hands never at rest. 
My first love looked like Mickey Rourke, one of the handsome guys in school and he asked me to date him!  I was feeling whole, my dreams had came true. I remember him as one does with first love with romantic eyes, we never argue, we had fun, we danced... we spent endless hours talking. He had this "mobylette" that i thought was sooooo cool riding behing him feeling his male scent how unerving that was and exciting! We were free spirited but still so shy. He was very protective over me, felt for the first time beautiful and bright.
I remember how my grand-mother loved the idea, how i could count on her. I used to smoke at the time he didn't...clever guy! 
It was 24 years ago...but a simple email brought it back as it was yesterday. I loved those months one of the happiest in my life.
What a pleasant and unexpected surprise. It all come out through the blog. As i look back now i realize that all my past is in my present and certainly in my future. I keep on with friends from childhood who know me for ages, who know me by heart from friends that i have met up recently where souls recognizes themselves out from criativity. Love this continuity,  this balance, this knowing where i come from but this freedom to be who i want to be and hopefully there's a lot ahead of me. I have learned my lessons over the years, don't take anything for granted.
How odd that my first love and my forever love over the centuries  share the same passion for a film a a music " le grand bleu"Eric Besson  when they aren't the same age nor from the same nationality.
God's way i dare to write....
Have a good week

2011...you go girl!

  Between Christmas and New Eve time stands still,  there are always a lot of joy and gratitude in the air.
 It's a moment of peace where families and friends get together, share, exchange, bounds become more profound each year. It's a moment to remember with tenderness the ones that are no longer but will remain forever in our hearts. It's a time of rest where the worries lay aside, where we take good resolutions hoping that this year maybe we can keep some of them.....for a month at least! December is a blessed month for me, preparing with love and care the presents, forseeing their happiness, knowing that mom is cooking delicious meals that i won't find anywhere in the world. It's a moment to remember those who are alone or like this year who have their flights cancelled and couldn't make it to their destination. It's a moment to make amend. I cherish the dream that next year will be better that the crisis will pass that abundance will return that we have learned the lessons out of it.
It's a moment of expectation
 What is there for me in 2011?
 What insights will i receive?
Will i grow and evolve?
Will i understand what is there to be worked out?
Will i have the guts to do it?
So many answered questions .....
Have fun
Remember to laugh every day
Dance with your love
Cook chocolates cake and drink them with champagne
Right love letters to your love and hide them in his trousers
Live life fully