22 setembro, 2009

It's all about inconditional LOVE

I just finished this altered book with a true nest dedicated to my grandmother, mom and myself.I hesitate at first as the nest seem so delicate and fragile but then...what a challenge. Made from an old book with pages tearing apart , found some newspapers from 1945, an old manuscrit bought in New York,my little drawers with tarot cards( both my mom and grandmother have an enormous intuition) I try to represent everyone of us. It was fun and easy, we share so many memories, complicity and most of all UNCONDITIONAL LOVE.
As i was sewing the 1945 newspaper"le Figaro", i kept wondering about all that my beloved grandmother had gone through world war 2, the fear, Paris being occupied, living each day not knowing if tomorrow would come, finding basic food to give to her family...even in my worst nightmares i can't imagine what it represents living under constant fear. What courage those generations had. You will tell me every decade has his struggle, so true but yet we live in a free world and there's nothing compare to freedom.My mother fall in love in 1967 with a portuguese man, Dad and at that time Portugal was under a dictature that was very difficult to her. She had to wait till 1974 and Carnation Revolution for the democracy to install and the price was very high for a lot of people.Very controversial times. Now we have to face a different type of war but nonetheless scary. So Love is the answer and always will be. I know i kept repeating myself... I was very inspire and took a lot of pleasure, adding little signs here and there.   
Love is the ultimate healer
Love is where i want to go. 
Love is what i want to give and receive
Love is the best thing to experience  Have fun and enjoy

17 setembro, 2009

Flea market in Paris

For us who love to craft, Paris is a magical place. I convince Luis to come with me to "les puces de clignancourt". First stop, I recommend a baguette with saucisson(not light but so tasty) along with a bordeaux, chinon ou côtes du rhônes and enjoy, then you are able to fully appreciate the vue. I know french don't have a good reputation so I was more than happy to hear back in Artfest that I was an exception(must be my portuguese side!) once you've overcome the fact that french are bad humored towards everyone not just you! you can relax and start the search. It's like disneyland, so many treasures.I was completely excited to find a 18th doll little dress, it's absolutely gorgeous, the story that it carries, who did it belong to, what misteries lay within...I was close to tears with emotion, Luis at that point was sharing my happiness and content and help me find others small objects. It was a blessed day! We laugh, dance and hug a lot. Back in the studio, I look at my small doll dress and touch it now and then just to feel the texture, and even the smell of ancient. LOVE IT LOVE IT LOVE IT... My mother made me yesterday an hipnose session and had me commit to have two sessions every week, as she thinks i need to regain some balance and strengh in my life. Normally i should made them alone but of course i'm lazy and love her slow and deep voice.The results of erickson hipnose are quite espectacular if one pratices with regularity.I'm blessed and very fortunate to have chosen such a mom, who is always happy, giving her energy and her time around. HAVE FUN and ENJOY... BE HAPPY

16 setembro, 2009

I need to pray

 I need to pray.I come to realize over those years as my life hasn't turn the way I wanted it to be, that I forgot God. I remember back in my thirties how much I crave for love, how worry I was to remain alone. That was my ultimate desire , TO BE IN LOVE.Then I met Luis my beloved husband and remember this is it...Finally I'm Home little did I know that LIFE is an ongoing struggle(at least for me of course).
Don't get me wrong, I value the love we have together, deeply believe it's rare, profound and unique, but I HAD A DREAM....
The dream of the husband,2 childrens and the dog or a cat!!!!!
So common one could say,I don't want to climb the everest or save the world, just to add my small contribution by loving family and friends the best I can. That's where I forgot God and become very enraged for a moment and still am once in a while! How can this happen to me, I refuse despite the utter evidence that I'm in a fertility program that maybe it won't work, maybe I will never hold my child,maybe after all those years there's no happy end. I heard so many stories with so many solutions.I still have 3 to go...and now I've become so confused, do I really want a child or I relish the idea of beeing like everyone else, beeing part of the whole? Am I forcing God's will? Am I punished? My husband repeats me that it's like a mantra, an obsession. We tend to believe with all this positive new age current that everything is possible, we have the control of our lives....when did we came up with this absolutely crazy idea? God is in charge and will always be. Period, no need to argue or to bargain. My mental is ok with that but deep within I recognize it's difficult TO LET GO, REALLY BECOME A BELIEVER THAT GOD KNOWS WHAT IS BEST FOR ME.
How do you manage to achieve that? So many questions without answers...One just had to experience, bad or good in the end that's what we came here for? isnt'it?
I managed not to drown completely over this last four years, a new world of creativity and friends opened to me with mixed media. Be blessed. I'm proud of me as I choose the LOVE PATH, not always easy the bitter one was so close but I fight back. Maybe I will never become a mother but definetely I become a better person and don't we all have ours wounds to heal?
LOVE IS THE ANSWER...and always will be
Nb: If you're in Paris go Rue du bac to have this miraculous medals, there's a certain energy around.

01 setembro, 2009


I'm coming to you my love...Tomorrow will be together if God allows it. Feel you, hold you, kiss you. 
You are my joy, my love , my safe nest....Sleep well as is 22pm in Lisbon and 16pm here in Mexico. I'm going to work with you aside as you are always.