31 agosto, 2009

Secret desire

I'm in Mexico city the weather is pretty bad.....i'm homesick! I want to go HOME. I want to ckeck the mail, other pages must have arrived by now, start working on Jessica's page dream theme.....CREATE and stay at Home with my beloved husband. How does it sound? A very good program but before, off I go to Sao Paulo which is another mega city, very crowded and polluted. If you start thinking about the people living here everyday, with the huge trafic the constant noise. How do they remain focused, balanced? it's almost impossible to be equilibrated when you look around? Where to escape? How they manage to live and still pursue their dreams it's a mistery, but that is also what's incredible with the human being is our capacities to adapt and adjust no matter the difficulties. Most of them left their villages in hope for a better life, do they regret it? They were in their village with Mother Nature around, knowing everyone from childhood with a deep sense of comunity and friendship but with little expectations for work so they had the courage and determination to leave to "the capital". What is the purpose in OUR LIFES? What are we here for? Does everyone have a mission? If yes what is mine for example? What is yours? 
 How do you recognize your goal in LIFE? What to fight for? and when do we need to let go? As i travelled around the world and fortunately meet all kind of different people we all share the secret desire OF LOVE and BEING LOVED. LOVE IS THE ANSWER and always will be.

24 agosto, 2009

Collaborative project

I've send my altered book to my dear art friend Amanda who send it to? So for now is a big mystery but i know he will be cherish and treasure. I dream of being part of a collaborative project so i'm in, good for me. i'm waiting the postman impatiently did i receive any letter from the US? not today maybe tomorrow. Jessica theme is dream. Tami is witches Jill vintage stuff...it's really exciting but most of all it gives me a feeling of being part of... be integrated, sharing with art friends giving,paying attention and thanks to Artfest. There was truly a before and after Artfest

18 agosto, 2009

Loyalty over the years

I've come to realize how much i carry of my grandmother's own story. It's rather interesting to observe in our life's what belongs to us and what doesn't.Most of the time it skips one generation rather inconsciously and it can become a burden over the years. I have this inconscious loyalty towards my beloved Mamie that i want to let go for now. It seems easy writing it down but how will i know the interior work has been made? When my LIFE starts to change,will answer my wise mom!!! My homework is to write a letter about my feelings, what i want and don't want to keep, then burn the letter and doing it till i feel that it's ok. I've done it in the past for others problems that kept me from evolving and the results were awesome. Now it seems more confusing as is for someone i deeply love and worship. You will reply me that one thing is loving someone and the other is reprove certain attitudes...correct but still i will need more than one letter! Old habits die hard... another strong belief that i have to eradicate as everything that i attract come from my thoughts and beliefs. Mamie used to tell us over and over that one has to fight, Life is hard, Life is a struggle... Tomorrow first thing in the morning, my letter and then off to the beach.. LIFE IS FUN LIFE IS FULFILLING and then thursday RIO DE JANEIRO Le Bonheur est aussi une question de volonté

08 agosto, 2009

Good memories

i spent the whole day in my studio, creating, organizing, throwing away...i found in my old trunk my marriage photos who are still disorganized after 4 years!!! 500 hundreds photos and without lying there must be about 10 who are correct...Fortunately i had good friends who made a video which is great.My thoughts wandered, i kept thinking about a friend who is single, another one who has 6 childrens and want to be at rest just for the weekend! another one just divorced, i want to have children ...as the Dalai Lama says the constant desire, the urge to have more,the not accepting and living in the present is what makes us insatisfied and unhappy. I remember 2002 september 2 as being one of the happiest of my life, i truly felt like a princess in my beautiful sissi dress and enjoyed every minute of it. I felt this is my day ! and i dance and dance and dance...want to regain that feeling of completely freedom...This is my wish for my forties be assertive, don't want to be manipulated anymore by friends who live in constant drama, who are vampires and drain my energy. HAVE FUN...MAKE LOVE and DANCE DANCE DANCE

06 agosto, 2009

New Cat...Frimousse

One of the good and unexpected gifts i received for my birthday...is this sweet 2 months baby cat,we called him Frimousse, sweet tender face in french.It means the world to me! i grow up as my husband did with dogs around, i used to sleep, eat with my beloved dog Pimba, told him my dreams, my griefs and he listened always...patiently. whenever i opened the door he came running to me, best friend for the lonely little girl that i was, my brother being more an outsider (tenis, football boys stuff...) i truly believe that an animal rest our soul, energize us. So there's this sweet baby cat , Frimousse we should called him "glue" as he's always by our side, a dog-cat actually and of course we love it. My husband who is constantly surprising me, didn't want the cat as i travel so much and he would have to take care of him! bla bla bla...now first thing Luis does when arriving home is" where is my favorite cat?"pussy pussy... buy him special food...and so on. Indeed my husband is one of the few persons that over the years has made so many inspirational changes and i admire him deeply. it takes a lot of guts and one amongst others qualities he possess is NOT CARING FOR WHAT PEOPLE THINK OF HIM... he doesn't take anything for granted, evolving, growing. My husband is a truly genuine person and that's unfortunately so rare nowadays. His friends can count on him, he will stick to them no matter what, supporting helping others. Tomorrow heading to the beach...get inspired and back to the studio to work Thanks my FRIENDS for all your caring messages for my 40.... Good to be loved and cherished(esta Stephane é para ti! )

05 agosto, 2009

Mes 40 ans...Comme le temps passe vite

There's the tradition in Portugal to celebrate the mother on each aniversary. BONNE ANNIVERSAIRE MAMAN aussi...I was very aware when i choose to encarnate in my mother's belly that we have lived many lives before, it's been a wonderful journey, since my youth not always easy as we are strong headed but when i look around i am always in awe of my mother generosity spontaneity joy...as a common friend says "sylviane is always the soul of a party" and i add SHE 'S TRULY THE SOUL OF MY HUSBAND BROTHER AND MYSELF...and if God allows it of her grandchildren to be. I am not a very extroverted person, rather shy beeing all day with my music in the studio creating makes my day! So when the idea of celebrating my 40 birthday arises i was reluctant, mixed feelings, still have to work my self esteem. and of course as Colin Tipping writes you get what you think...and there it was almost everyone confirmed the invitation and the day before or the D day......just came up with some excuse for not showing up...THE ONES WHO CAME ARE INDEED MY TRUE FRIENDS...but still there's this crawling feeling who is turning me down, une sensation de déjà vu. WHY do i always feel that others are more important WHY do i value others more than me WHY do i depreciate myself WHY ......... WHY others are always more talented fun bright......than me I wrote in a former page finally I LOVE MYSELF ......which is true but i realize not completely though otherwise i wouldn't feel so sad and disappointed . How many more excercises must i do to integrate that it s ok i m a good person there's nothing shameful inside of me i don't need to say yes......when i want to say NO people won't love me more if i constantly say yes on the contrary........ Mixed feelings are hard to go but i trust they will ...... i want to TO GIVE A BIG HUG to my extraordinary husband that i profoundly love and admire. Merci mon amour pour ta pacience ta force ton courageas another friends say it's karmic between you and Luis and i agree with her. HAVE FUN.......I had last night ,i dance till exaustion great music BEST FRIENDS EVER super sangria.... THANK YOU MERCI OBRIGADO